colon

The worst part about most bad things, from death to taxes, is the dread. Sitting around worrying about something makes the bad event appear ten times worse.

I've noticed lately that I'm getting a bunch of e-mails trying to sell me things to clean out my colon, complete with disgusting color photos of what appear to be 5-foot turds. They're peddling yogurts with "fiber" in them, too. Who wants laxative in their yogurt?

But today's e-mail took the cake, so to speak.

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Sure, you jerks and your factory farms can cause my spinach to harbor e. Coli, but at least I won't ever be dealing with escarole's revenge.

Publix fills prescriptions for oral antibiotics like Cipro for free.  FREE!  Did you know this?  Unbelievable, and much appreciated by folks like me without insurance and with a case of colon critters.  Thank you Publix.

Not making fun of anybody who has dyslexia, just to be clear.

When I seen Sigmoid Colon I think of Sigmund Freud.

That just has so many connotations, I shudder.

I think it is time we had a crash course on that famous anatomic and diagnostic enigma, the appendix. The appendix is a muscular tube the diameter of a standard pencil and of variable length located at the very beginning of the colon, where the small intestine dumps our unneeded food goo so that poop can be formed. It has no known critical function. You can find a picture of it here...