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blue dress

The Matchy

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When I was a teenager, my mother had a habit of waking me up on Sunday mornings by asking what I was wearing to church. “Ummm, probably my pink Laura Ashley dress,” I’d say groggily. Mom would flit off somewhere and I’d rub my eyes and stumble into the shower, emerging fully dressed from my room an hour later to find her wearing a pink outfit that perfectly coordinated with mine.

No Blue Dress Required

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The proof is in. Hillary Clinton is, as was long rumored, a human being. Thus, ending a once promising exodus into the terrestrial wasteland of electing the first extra-terrestrial President:

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